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  • Writer's pictureThe Paladins

How to enjoy a night out on the Tiles


I like going out to the local pub. There's one on every corner. Some of them are open 24 hours a day, while others have much shorter hours. While they all serve watery beers, for the really lucky customers, who have had a good day at work, they also serve a range of exotic cocktails.


That's why it's always important to work hard in business. The harder you work, the more money you make from your clients, who really enjoy paying for all your different services that they never knew you were so good at. Thwt's why you get offered such a wide range of cocktails by the array of friendly barmen, all of whom greet you politely and serve you efficiently.


My favourite pub is in London. It's a funny pub - it always makes me laugh. It's next to the academy of Greek interpreters, and it's full of mysterious and unusual people who shouldn't be there. They've just popped in off the last flight, and someone at the airport tells them that this is the best bar in town. So in they go, with their expensive watches and their Savile Row suits and their families and friends and their beautiful wives. And surprise surprise, because they're not from London, the first thing they think they need is an interpreter. But really they don't. Because we already speak English.


This bar - I forget it's name and so do all my friends - is just on a sharp corner in central London. You should always use the traffic lights. It is very comfortable and luxurious, full of beautiful women that we know well. They're all wearing sharp pointy high heels, and they are friends of ours. The only problem with high heels is that the stairs down to the toilets are very steep, and sometimes they can be slippery. And when you get to the bottom there's nobody to help you wipe up. You might find yourself in the dark down there. And then it's too late to find the light switch.


My favourite cocktail is a Moscow Mule. What's yours?


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