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  • Writer's pictureThe Paladins

Enjoying a quiet evening in

We like Thursday evenings and Friday evenings, and other parts of those days, because they are quiet and relaxing. You just stay at home, and nothing unpleasant or difficult happens to you. You sit there in silence, enjoying yourself, with your expensive brandy or whisky or something else like that, with the same sorts of consequences, and nobody comes to bother or disturb you. That's why you spend Thursdays and Fridays and also various other days, inside. Because you don't need to go out, because your good friends come to see you.

You earned those quiet Thursdays and Fridays and all those other days. You worked hard for them. At first you didn't work so hard, because you thought you didn't have to and the brandy and the whisky and the other things were cheap and freely available and all you had to do was to talk to your strange friends who are no longer available because they are also having quiet or quieter times and they would deliver you your brandy and your whisky and all your other things and also they would contribute to your happy family life. But then you realised that we wanted to help you too. But that meant that you had to work harder and harder. Now you didn't panic; professionals like you never panic when people like us come to help you with your work. But you found yourself working harder and harder for no reason at all. And we found that extremely confusing and peculiar. And that's why we are here to support you with your quiet evenings in.

Now you can work even harder, which we know you enjoy so much, and we want to help you enjoy yourselves and that's why we've put so many resources into helping you live in a permanent pleasure park. Because we are your friends and we are going to help you all the way to the end.

That's why we're going to help you talk to all those nice people in smart suits and smart uniforms and some of them even wear wigs and robes in other countries but we don't know anything about that. These are all nice kind decent people who want to help you, and that's why you will be having a quiet night in that you enjoy so often in the future. Also, you won't have to pay for any of those people. We're going to do that for you. So you will have all your money left for your families, who will be really happy that you are having quiet nights in because they admire you and appreciate you for all your hard work and effort to make their names so reputable.

Would you like to spend five nights in, and then two nights in as well? If you would like, and even if you wouldn't, then we can arrange that for you and we are going to. That's because we don't know anything about any of you, and that's why you will be enjoying extended quiet nights in that you will be enjoying, even if the lights are dark and the music is playing, again and again and again.

My friend Andrew, he works with me to help people like you have quiet nights in. One time he didn't, but now he does. And that's why you will be having happy and quiet nights in, all together or separated far apart by distance, and even in foreign countries, enjoying your nights in for the rest of your lives.

We are pleased you thought about your life choices, and now we are going to help you do everything necessary to see them fulfilled. Congratulations on your life choices, and have a quiet evening in!

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